Just do the next right thing
How flailing as a mother made me a better leader
During the first twelve months of my son’s life, postpartum depression hit me hard. In short, I did not enjoy parenting. I found it challenging, unfulfilling, and unrelenting. I commonly wondered if I had made a huge mistake, wondered if I was going to be trapped in this for the next few decades.
Luckily, as my son turned one, the postpartum depression fog lifted. I started to enjoy my role as a mother. I found him delightful and hilarious. And I’ve thoroughly found each stage since to be fulfilling and a value-add to my life.
It didn’t happen intentionally, but the mindsets that I put in place to survive that first year have stuck around. In order to not be completely overwhelmed by the life-changing nature of parenthood, I focused on one wake window at a time. There was so much that I couldn’t control, so much that would be upended that it made planning a futile exercise. So I just took it one wake window at a time and relished the break that the nap would give me. I recentered myself and then took on the next wake window.
Embarrassingly, I thought a lot about what Anna from Frozen said: Just do the next right thing. (I even tried to find grown-up looking prints of this quote for my office, to no avail.)
The enormity of the challenges facing media, whether it be revenue strategy or the brutal job market, can be incredibly overwhelming. All we can do is take it one day at a time, one meeting at a time. We can develop the internal skills to adapt and be flexible. We can do the next right thing, which to me means that we are making the best decisions we can with the information that we have at the time. We won’t solve the deep dysfunction of media overnight, but we can work at it every day.
This survival tactic has also, interestingly and fortunately, made me a more present parent. Because I cannot solve the great problems facing my role or my industry in a short time period, I have found myself able to disconnect and be more present in the evenings and on weekends. I cannot control what the afternoon brings, so I might as well be fully present as we explore the aquarium in the morning. I cannot control what Monday will bring, so I might as well set my phone down and build some Magna Tile towers on Sunday.
As he has gotten older, we’ve been able to plan more, but I think of these things more as “ideas” than plans. We can have every intention of leaving at 9:30, but if he won’t sit on the potty, we won’t be leaving on time. And… that’s okay. We can adjust, and the world isn’t going to end.
This adaptability has been made me a better journalist and leader, and it’s a skill I hope I can continue building.
What I’m reading
Things You’ll Learn The Hard Way: Why smart people make bad decisions
The Cut: Where Lifestyle Creep Really Starts
Neuroscience and News: What it was like being an influencer 15 years ago
Mississippi Free Press: What Exactly Is ‘Statewide’ Journalism?
The best thing I made this week
Yesterday, I made these cheesy baked buffalo chicken meatballs. They were good, but I plan to make some tweaks next time to turn down the intensity of the buffalo sauce.
See you next week,
Rachel
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